"mein herze schwimmt im blut"

a salad of sliced hearts of palm, orange peppers, maui onion and blood orange segments with a blood orange vinaigrette.

i am probably telling you more about me than anything i've ever written by admitting one of my favourite movies is "the freshman", possibly the greatest movie about self-absorption and komodo dragons (until they make the sharon stone biopic of course). and of course, my favourite character is larry london--a bloated, rambling, eccentric german chef, prone to sudden outbursts. i had seen the movie so much when it first came out that now larry's outbursts are my own (thankfully only in my head), including bach's cantata no. 199, "mein herze schwimmt im blut", which larry so helpfully points out means "my heart swims in blood". so true, larry, so true.

and there, nenes, is the inspiration for this salad.


blood orange vinaigrette

juice remaining from a segmented blood orange, plus one whole one if not particularly juicy
a couple tablespoonfuls of olive oil and red wine vinegar
salt and white pepper to taste
a tiny glop of a good honey
a light dusting of fennel pollen, if available

whisk together, and drizzle over salad.

update: just had a chat with special combo, and remembered her tangerines and pepper salt; in honour of that try adding finely chopped thai bird chilis to the vinaigrette for a little aibm stylee.

tea sarnies tutorial

i don't know anybody who invites anyone over for tea--well, nothing past a cuppa and a cake anyway, but you never know. it could happen. i do some informal catering for family members and occasionally i'll get a request for a tea sandwich or finger food (no, not like this, goofballs) for a party, and sarnies are usually an inexpensive, easy route to go. face it, no one is ever going to get full eating these, so you might as well make 'em pretty (okay, aesthetically pleasing). if you ever find yourself in need of some light nosh (or, if you need an excuse to serve cupcakes later), and you have no desire to break the bank, these cucumber salmon sandwiches look fahhbulous, taste great, are easy to assemble, and cost pennies. well, dimes, maybe.

ingredients:
any sort of sliced medium density loaf bread--you don't want something so soft that it can't handle the weight of the toppings, but you don't want anything too hearty to compete with the cucumbers
softened cream cheese or butter
wasabi (or finely chopped fresh herbs)
cucumbers (i use japanese variety ones as they have less moisture)
smoked salmon

1. mix the softened cheese or butter with wasabi or herbs, salt and pepper. spread a thin layer of this mixture onto a slice of bread. 2. slice the cucumbers as thinly as possible into long ribbons. you can use a mandoline, but i just use a good vegetable parer. lay and overlap the slices lengthwise across the bread.

3. trim the edges off the bread with a sharp knife so you get a good square or rectangle. see? pretty already. cut these down to bars or triangles, so you get no more than two or three bites per 'wich.

4. cut little rounds out of slices of smoked salmon. i use a kewpie mayonnaise top, but many drink bottle tops will work. decorate each sandwich piece with one salmon round.

impress your friends and family with your mad skillz, y'all. snort. only you'll know how truly dorktastic these were to make.

dress your tea in corduroy and salmon

a few months ago, i was reading a post on f*ck corporate groceries, and learned about moogdrenk, a caffeinated cocoa. i have to tell you, i was more than a little excited by this, but the caffeine is from guarana, which i've had some iffy experiences with in terms of quality and effect of inferior product. i have yet to buy it as i once spent time with a rock star-type skater-type guy who drank a guarana product every day when he was on tour, and it was pretty helpful during the rigors of travel and touriness, but it took him at least six months to kick his guarana addiction. not pretty when he was amped and didn't have 16,000, 1600, 160, 16, 1.6 people to scream lyrics at and no one cared about his mctwist into a fakie backslide frontside half cab kickflip over the pyramid hip. or something like that. whatever. i'm sure the guarana in moogdrenk (man, i love typing that word) is quality, but the stigma remains for me, 'm'fraid.

anyway, it turns out that the company that makes this drink, steep, is run by a bunch of skaters, and besides the moogdrenk, they have some really nice tea. my favourite for the moment is corduroy, a blend of green tea, vanilla and caramel (natural) flavours. it is quite delightful served chilled, as i had the other day, with some schmantzy but tasty tea sandwiches made with cucumber, wasabi flavoured cream cheese, and smoked salmon.

totoro tutorial

this one's for cousin karen and anyone who wants to make a totoro at home!

ingredients:
fondant (it's easiest to buy it premade, but here's a recipe if you can't find any)
food colouring (1 colour is enough, but if you want, also use black for the nose and pupils)
filling (anything firm--marzipan, nut paste, ganache, fudge, even peanut butter mixed with confectioner's sugar, or a marshmallow)



1. tint one big walnut chunk sized hunk of fondant any colour you want. knead until smooth and pliable. knead a smaller fat nut sized ball of white fondant. the fondant is easy to work with (like that play dough stuff) and pieces will stick to each other with little effort.



2. shape coloured chunk into a rough egg or strawberry shape. you can also wrap it around a small ball of filling. roll a bit of the coloured chunk into a fat rope and cut into four pieces at a diagonal. roll out two little balls of white, and and even littler ball. flatten out a bit of the white fondant into an oval-shape that is larger on one end.



3. stick two of the rope pieces on the top of the coloured egg piece for ears, two on the sides for arms. smooth the white oval about halfway down the coloured egg shape and fold the rest underneath. flatten out the two bigger white balls and place on either side of the smaller white ball for a face.

4. use a toothpick dipped in dark food colouring to colour in the nose bit, add pupils, mouth, and um, totoro chest hair.



totoro ready to go!

tortilla tamagoyaki, or the oslo-obachan omelette (imtb 2)

a cross between a spanish omelette (tortilla), and japanese tamagoyaki: sauteed potato, onion, and cabbage inside a rolled omelette of beaten eggs thinned with vegetable stock, seasoned with soy sauce, and served with oyster sauce. this was inspired by obachan's personal foodie event is my tamagoyaki burning?, and oslofoodie's tortilla. then i remembered that she has a thing for eggs with oyster sauce, which definitely rock the block, so there you go.

imbb 13 pt. 2: i should cocoa and naga cupcake

my second entry for this edition of imbb was only supposed to be one thing but the unfinished cake turned out so very good that this has turned into a sort of half and one entry, if you know what i mean.



chika recently reminded me of vosges chocolates, specifically of the naga truffle, which is milk chocolate with coconut flakes and sweet curry. i was so intrigued by this combination i decided to try making a cupcake based on these flavours.



what is good for the truffle is not necessarily good for the cupcake, so i set out to make a very mildly flavoured cake. even though cupcakes are individually sized, they can be quite substantial, and i wasn't sure anyone would want a whole cupcake packing a strong curry chocolate flavour. i started with the cake itself. i wasn't sure how to go about making a "milk" chocolate cake as all the recipes i came across used dark or semi-sweet chocolate, and i wasn't sure a straight milk chocolate substitution nor added milk or cream to it would work as i had already decided to use coconut milk in the recipe, so i ended up using dutch-processed cocoa powder, boosted with some chocolate extract, although i'm not sure it was necessary.

at first i wasn't sure about the chocolate cake produced, but i'm not a big fan of chocolate to begin with. however, after the second or third cupcake (hey, i gotta test 'em, right?), i have to say they were pretty darned good. they remind me more of a chocolate milkshake than a chocolate bar, just a hint of chocolate with a milky coconut undertone. mmm. these cupcakes definitely did a bridget jones as i liked them just as they were. however, i did have to naga-hyde them, so i frosted a few with a chocolate ganache made by melting a bunch of cadbury dairy milk eggs and mini-bars (let's hope my god-daughter doesn't notice i raided her easter egg basket!) with a little bit of heavy cream, then boosted with a couple teaspoonfuls of sweet curry powder, a curry blend with fenugreek, ginger, nutmeg, cardamom, and cloves amongst quite a few other things. the ganache was wonderful, chocolatey and somehow smoky, and it was tempered well by the cake.



this cupcake turned out to be more fine than funky, and in this season of excessive chocolate novelties, why not add another to the list?


i should cocoa cupcakes

250 g softened unsalted butter
250g white sugar
4 eggs
2 tbsp chocolate extract (optional)
185g self-raising flour
60g all-purpose flour
40g dutch processed cocoa (although, i did add more later when i wasn't thrilled with the colour, so use your best judgement)
185ml coconut milk

cream butter and sugar together until light and fluffy; add eggs until well-incorporated. add chocolate extract. sift the flours and cocoa powder together. alternate folding in the flour-cocoa mix and adding the coconut milk into the mixture. stir until smooth, adding more cocoa powder to the batter if it just looks weird to you, to whatever shade you prefer. fill paper-lined muffin tins and bake in a 350˚F preheated oven for 20 minutes. cool completely before frosting.

imbb 13 pt. 1: matcha cupcakes with pistachio cream and totoro "truffles"

imbb 13 is here, and the theme is cupcakes, babies, CUPCAKES!!!! i thank you, maki, for being a gracious hostess cupcake :-D



these are matcha green tea cupcakes with pistachio cream frosting. i don't normally "do" flavours but i love matcha, so i thought i'd try to modify bill granger's vanilla cupcake recipe, and i paired it with pistachios because...um, they're both green. and the flavours work together well, as these cakes are quite mild.



the first cupcake was frosted with a pistachio mascarpone cream inspired by a recipe i found at deb's blog, words to eat by. i just mixed equal parts of pistachio paste with mascarpone cream until it reached a spreadable consistency (you might need to thin it with milk, but i didn't). the cream was fantastic--tangy, rich, and very nutty, but unfortunately, it completely overpowered the subtle matcha cakes, so i tried just adding a couple tablespoonfuls of pistachio paste to a cup of whipped heavy cream which worked out much better.



as for the totoros, they were made with some pistachio paste covered in fondant. as for why the totoros, well, why not?

matcha cupcakes

250 g softened unsalted butter
250g white sugar
4 eggs
240g sifted self-raising flour
180ml cold green tea
1 1/2 to 2 tbsps good quality matcha powder

cream butter and sugar together until light and fluffy; add eggs until well-incorporated. alternate folding in the flour and adding the cold tea into the mixture. stir until smooth, adding enough powdered matcha to reach a jade-coloured batter, or whatever shade you prefer. be careful adding more than a few tablespoonfuls as it can get quite bitter the darker you go. fill paper-lined muffin tins and bake in a 350˚F preheated oven for 20 minutes. cool completely before frosting.

comfort me?

the lovely moira from who wants seconds? has a contest going on, and the deadline is tonight, 12 midnight PST. the theme: your favourite comfort food. i was specifically called out :-) and i am not one to shirk a challenge, whatever it may be. so, sweet lady, here's my entry--you may regret the casual invitation after you read this, but ahhhh...too late!

i have many issues with food. there are more days i am indifferent to it than i love it, but more days than that that i am a-ok with it and very few days when i downright hate it. i have allergies, i have dislikes, i have predilections, i have preferences. i find new flavours, i find old history, i discover the unknown, i uncover the long forgotten. the one thing i do not do is find comfort in it. when you are hurt or hurting, i do not run to feed you, i run to heal you. when i am hurt or hurting i do not try to ease my pain with a bowl, but often i try to express my pain with a howl. my emptiness cannot be filled with warm soups, hearty porridges, or hefty stews, my inadequacies cannot be diminished by a perfect crust, a delicate crumb, or golden sheen. when i am wracked with worry, guilt, or sadness i eat for physical nourishment, but i taste copper, blood, or nothing. i will burn my tongue and not care. i will shovel down cold glue-ish food and move on.

perhaps, though, perhaps....i remember the homeless man who came up to me in the farmer's market. there were security guards coming from either side to usher him away from the naive young girls and hapless tourists. he came up quietly but determined, and he asked, soft-spokenly, "all i ask for is enough for a meal." how could i refuse? the security guards retreated, respectfully, and i got up and offered not money, but to buy him lunch. the closest kiosk was the old-fashioned mexican joint. normally, i would never eat there, as the food was looked greasy, sitting heavy in the steam pans all day, covered with pinkish grey refried beans, orange cheese, and pale, barely green iceberg lettuce. i was in california where i could get the "real" thing, why would i choose this "amex" throwback? and the burly men with the loud laughs and louder insults were intimidating. but there it was. what would you like? i asked politely. uncomfortably. he was uncomfortable, too. he shrugged, i suppose, unused to choices at this time. the older, usually garroulous man behind the counter was quiet but took charge. he gave him a plate with an enchilada, a burrito. a salad. some chips. i could swear there was more food there than he would normally give. some extra meat. extra cheese. and did he slip in something more in that brown paper bag? i will never know, but the sack was definitely heavier than i think it should be. i handed him the cash, and he nodded as i took the bag. i nodded back, and handed the man his lunch. he took the bag. i extended my hand again. we looked each other in the eye and i said "good luck". the security guards appeared at his side, and i would like to think that he was at least afforded the opportunity to eat his meal in comfort.

of course, i never saw him again. of course, i never got the same opportunity again. it breaks my heart to see those less fortunate, and to see those so fortunate that they can waste so much food that can go to those that need it. i am guilty of not appreciating what i have or what i can do. i have wasted as much as i have saved. i've given money and food to food banks and homeless shelters, i've bought meals for the homeless and the hungry, but i've also withheld pennies or denied an upturned hand. i've never felt the same as at that moment. at that moment, i was as equal as everyone around me. and the food was as grand as it ever was going to get. my levels of respect for everyone went up, my levels of respect for the lowliest of food did too. i do not thumb my nose at "fast" inadequate or ill-advised food. i will eat anywhere. i will eat with anyone. i will eat anything.

the mexican joint is gone. the men are gone. but perhaps the moment of comfort remains.

how the east was won, pt. 2: samurai bakery

japanese bread

i think some form of bread most likely existed in japan before the arrival of the portuguese, as something brought over from china or the chinese, but damned if i can find any proof of that. no matter, this is about the portuguese. the 16th century saw the sleepy japanese fishing village of nagasaki transformed into a bustling seaport when in 1571, portuguese sailors set up a trading post with the cooperation of the local daimyo. the traders brought the west to japan, most notably guns and God, but also culinary delights like the concept of deep-frying, and baking bread and cake. yeah. grease and carbs. you can smell the downfall already.

despite its early arrival, the first attempts at japanese breadmaking were dismal failures, due to the scarcity of wheat flour, yeast and sugar. bread was hard, salty, and sour, and did not appeal to the japanese palate. fast forward several hundred years to the meiji period. the portuguese have been kicked out, returned, the daimyo taken out of power, and the feudal system dismantled. samurai are stripped of their status, and left to their own devices. what is a ex-bureaucratic swordsman with a penchant for poetry to do?

for samurai yasubei kimura, the answer was to devote his energy towards baked goods, and he opened bakery kimura-ya in tokyo sometime in 1871. he originally based his product on dutch-style breads, as his chief baker had worked in a dutch household, and he catered to the western foreigners in the city. however, he and his family strived to develop a product that japanese would take to, and eventually they hired kodo katsuzo, who created a recipe using the kasu-zuke--sake lees, which are a fermented by-product of sake production--as a leavening agent, and a filling of anko or koshi-an, or mashed red bean paste, which appealed to the local population, and anpan was born.


anpan

in 1875, the bakery presented their creation to emperor meiji who was so delighted by it that he soon requested anpan on a daily basis. with this ringing endorsement, anpan and other breads became popular throughout the nation. (now, god bless john belushi, but dontcha think this is the samurai flick tom cruise shoulda done?)


homemade anpan (i don't like too many beans in mine)

bread is so popular in japan today, that ironically, bakers find they must use rice flour in their baked goods to subsidize declining rice consumption. i find this somewhat shocking, as would anthony, as i believe he holds little regard for japanese baked goods. i myself rather like anpan, but don't love it. since so many bakeries here and in asia have it, you wouldn't normally think to make it, but i have found a rather good recipe for it. the bread is less fluffy and cottony than commercial varieties, and while distinctly less european, the flavour and texture are distinct if somewhat disconcerting. it is chewy and sweet, not unlike a stale marshmallow. despite this curious description, it is unique, and has an added character that makes it a more japanese creation than not.

there's always room for (neon) jello

yeah, yeah, portagee bread, i know. i'll get back to it, but right now i'm a little ready for this jelly, nenes. no, it's not my favourite lush soap, it's fruity gelatin alternately layered with condensed milk gelatin, forming an enticing neon slab. and when you get bored with its fabulicious flaccid fat man belly wobbliness, chop it up, add it to more gelatin, and you have inside-out broken glass jello!

ensaymada

ensaymada, a filipino sweet bread, is one of the many pastries derived from spanish origins. ensaymada in fact are very much the same as their european counterpart, ensaimada, which are a pastry specialty of the balearic islands, most notably mallorca (majorca). although it is a spanish specialty, the origin of the ensaimada can theoretically be traced to the arabic occupation of the ibizan peninsula from 740 to 1235 AD and the explorations of the arab world by the spanish and portuguese. one belief is that the pastry may have been castilian, as the root of the name, saín, is the castilian medieval word for lard, from which the sweet breads are commonly made today. however, the arabic word for 'butter' was saim, which seems to be a better fit for the name, and for the pastry, which was known to be made originally with butter. it is thought that the mallorcan pastries only were made with lard when the catholic church encouraged the use of pork products to eradicate the arab indocrination of the region and to drive jews and arabs from the region altogether. controversial stuff, this.

however, by the time it got to the philippines, the recipe had reverted to its butter-based origins. the original sweet bread is one large snail-like coil dusted in sugar, but today individual sized cakes are more popular throughout the country. they are soft, buttery, milky and rich, and with the added slather of butter, sugar, and cheese, a sinful pillow of extravagance for your breakfast or tea.

ensaymada

3 1/2 to 4 teaspoonfuls of yeast
1/3 cup of lukewarm water
1 1/2 teaspoonfuls of white sugar

1/2 cup diluted evaporated milk or undiluted whole milk
1/2 cup white sugar
1/4 cup melted butter
3 egg yolks
2 1/2 to 3 cups unsifted all-purpose flour (after measuring sift flour)

grated mild white or yellow cheese, white sugar, softened butter for top or filling

dissolve the yeast in the lukewarm water and 1 1/2 teaspoonful of white sugar. mix, then set aside until bubbly. mix everything together until well incorporated and smooth. transfer dough into a greased bowl, let rise for one hour, then form into a log, flatten out and fill with cheese and butter (optional), or just coil into a snail shape in a greased pan. if you are making individual cakes, divide the dough in equal pieces, roll into logs and coil or knot and place in greased muffin tins. let rise for another hour, then brush with butter and bake in a preheated 300˚F oven for 25 minutes or until lightly brown. cool completely, slather with butter, dust with sugar and top with grated cheese, if desired.

better?

before

hello, doggy back from hospital, doing well. we all want to thank everyone for their kind thoughts and well wishes to the young pup, as he has literally bounced back. however, an unfortunate side effect that no one anticipated is that he is no longer a puppy and has turned into an albino vampire bat!!!!!

:-)


after

gaaah

i'm at risk of turning this into a dogblog, but since i already started it here, you should known puppy is in hospital being treated for parvo. hopefully, he will survive, but if you could spare a good or healing thought for him, he could surely use it right about now. i'll keep you updated....

interlude

hello, i haven't forgotten you, nor the pao doce chronicles. i've been a bit busy with one thing or another, but shall return quite soon. in the meantime, look at what we found in the boonies! isn't he a cutie? we haven't named him yet, but i'm thinking he looks like a ralph. ralph fukumoto. what do you think?

how the east was won, pt. 1

today is discovery day, the anniversary of ferdinand magellan's "discovery" of guam in 1521. of course, one should question how he could have discovered an island that was clearly already found and inhabited, but eh, anything for another holiday, right?

although magellan sailed under the spanish flag as a citizen of said country, he was actually portuguese. the portuguese explorers of the 15th through 18th centuries were a prolific and busy bunch, covering most of the pacific--vasco da gama landed in india, jorge alvarez in china, magellan in the marianas and the philippines, pedro fernandes de quieros in vanuatu, cristóvão de mendonca in australia, everyone in malacca....suffice it to say, the portuguese made their presence known.

i could probably make a case for the argument that the greatest contribution the portuguese made to asia was the introduction of potash, which is an important component for iron-making, and therefore the making of guns and firearms, but ugh, borrrring. however, potash in another form and completely different strength is a leavening agent, a form of baking powder. so, i rather weakly bring you the idea that the most important thing that the portuguese brought to asia is bread. not just any bread, but sweet bread, and sweet cake. in almost every major asian culture where the portuguese were found, sweet bread and sponge cake are staples in the cuisine. you will find these items in countries where wheat isn't even produced, where lactose intolerance is the norm, where the portuguese words for bread, pao and pan, are the same words in asian languages. now that's power, nenes.

*yawn*. blahblah. magellan was only on guam long enough to burn down a village, kill a few folks and steal a bunch of food, so there isn't actually any direct influence on the baked goods here. the major influence in the philippines was through spain, but i do believe that the sweet yeast breads that are common throughout the country actually originated with the portuguese explorers. pao doce/pan dulce, or, "sweet bread", is a mildly sweet, eggy and quite soft (unlike the more brioche-like spanish version) and is the base for many filipino confections.

for the next few days, i shall explore the lovely world of portuguese sweet breads in asia and the pacific, because it's my blog, fools.



i'm also doing this because i'm convinced that there are so many traditional recipes that are endangered by homogenization and modern conveniences, they need to be not only written down but made available to anyone who wants "the real thing". while i don't claim that any of these recipes are authentic, they are as close to what i remember as the real deal. the first of these recipes is for something rather ironically called spanish rolls, which i am absolutely convinced is endangered, because i had difficulty obtaining each and every one of the six recipes i *did* find, and only one of them was a keeper (and that was tweaked endlessly). these are soft, tender, and slightly elastic rolls, pale yellow from egg yolks and butter, sweet from sweet butter and sugar incorporated in the dough, and from the sweet butter and sugar mix spread upon the dough. they are then formed, and rolled in breadcrumbs before baking. fresh out of the oven they are irresistible, and truly complemented by a café con leche or thick, rich hot chocolate.

spanish rolls

dough
1 to 1 1/2 packets of yeast
1/4 c warm water
1/2 c milk
1/2 c melted butter
1/3 c sugar
4 egg yolks
1 tsp salt
3-3 1/2 c all purpose flour

filling (optional)
3/4 c breadcrumbs
1/2 c brown sugar
1 tbsp all-purpose flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp vanilla extract


extra breadcrumbs

dissolve yeast in warm water. in a bowl, combine milk, butter, sugar, egg yolks and salt. blend well then add the yeast mixture and enough flour to make a moderately stiff dough. transfer dough to a floured surface and knead until smooth and elastic. place dough in a greased bowl, cover and let rise until double in bulk.

punch down dough then divide into equal pieces. combine all the ingredients for the filling. roll out each dough into a small rectangle. brush with butter then spread with some of the filling (or you can just sprinkle a little sugar on the butter or omit this step). roll up, then cover in breadcrumbs. place seam side down on greased baking sheets. let rise until doubled in bulk again then bake in a preheated 325˚F oven for 20 minutes or until lightly brown.



similar, but not the same: kt from blue and yellow kitchen's cheese rolls. sweet and savoury, and thoroughly addictive.

imbb 13

this edition's theme, hosted by maki from i was just really very hungry.: my little cupcake (or muffin).

omg, did the mothership call or what??

spiced zucchini soup

a bill granger recipe, of course, but you don't actually need a recipe for this one. sliced zucchini is sautéed with finely chopped shallots in olive oil just until wilted; add prepared vegetable stock, some leftover cooked white rice, a scant teaspoonful of curry powder, then simmer. run through a food processor until it reaches a consistency you like, then hello! a fantastic vegan soup--vegetarian if you add a dollop of sour cream like i did. of course you can add whatever stock you prefer, and other vegetables or other spices, if the curry seems overwhelming.

socca

i don't know where i first came across this recipe, or even this food item, but i've always been intrigued by it. socca, a pancake made from chickpea or garbanzo flour, is a staple in provence, but as it is made from chickpeas, it makes me think that it probably originated in northern africa and travelled through southern europe.

there is a colourful history of socca here, but descriptions of the pancake varies; it can be anywhere from "slablike" to "wafer-thin", but i imagine it just matters what region you are in, or what your taste runs towards. i've tried making this in fat slabs, but it didn't appeal to me, so i've tweaked several recipes and have settled amiably with this crispy, wispy version loaded with lots of herbs. the thinness suits the garbanzo flour well, for as the crepe cooks, it turns a beautiful shade of golden brown, and crispy light. the nutty flavour of the bean is intensified, and the herbs have not been completely cooked through so they still retain a fresh bite. as you cook these, the kitchen fills with a warm, toasty aroma with herby, grassy undertones that reminds me of a hot, end-of-summer day.

socca
mix 125g all-purposegarbanzo flour with a pinch of salt and a generous glug of olive oil. add enough club soda or fizzy mineral water to create a thin batter. let the batter sit for at least 30 minutes. cook as a crepe in a frying pan with more olive oil, sprinkling a generous amount of finely chopped fresh herbs of your choosing on the batter before you flip it over to finish. cook through until crispy.

the barefoot contessa's coconut cupcakes

i trust the barefoot contessa's ina garten as a cook, like i trust bill granger. her recipes are no-nonsense, there's nothing about her that screams "chef" but she seems approachable, her food looks divine, and i trust her recipes. even though her coconut cupcake recipe is a little fussier than i'd prefer, they are moist, delicious, and worth the little extra effort.

eieieomeote: goldenrod eggs

goldenrod eggs: buttered toast, with an eggy cream sauce, topped with a grated hard boiled egg. a staple of home economics classes everywhere--at some point, anyway. its appeal for the junket set junta is that not only does it teach an addled adolescent how to boil an egg, but also how to create a cream sauce, temper an egg yolk, and use a grater efficiently.

i think i originally learned how to do this in summer camp, as home economics had been discarded from the curriculum in favour of japanese photography or spanish sex ed (doubling up on subjects meant saving time, money, and for a whole heckuvalotta hilarity); later, i found a more palatable recipe in marion cunningham's "breakfast book". if you are interested in a more authentic home ec experience, there is a recipe in a free e-book, originally published as a textbook in 1920, "Corner of Washington's Kitchen at Mount Vernon School and Home Cooking" by Carlotta C. Greer Head of the Department of Foods and Household Management, East Technical High School, Cleveland, Ohio. *whew*.

here's the home ec lesson, with my revised recipe, by way of bill granger and marion cunningham:

hard boiled eggs: place two eggs in a small saucepan, cover with cold water then bring to a boil on high heat. reduce to a simmer, then cook for another 5 to 7 minutes (up to ten if you have more eggs). set aside eggs.

cream sauce: heat 1 tablespoonful of butter in a saucepan until melted. add 1 tablespoonful of flour to the butter, stir and cook over medium heat for a minute or so. add 3/4 cup of whole milk and stir or whisk until the sauce has thickened. separate an egg yolk from a room temperature egg, and place in a small bowl. add a tablespoonful of the hot milk sauce into the yolk and mix briskly. now carefully add this to the rest of the sauce in the pan and incorporate it. cook further for 1 to 2 minutes, then take it off heat. season with salt, pepper, a shot of hot pepper sauce, and a squeeze of fresh lemon juice.

toast bread. butter generously. place on plate. spoon warm sauce over the toast. use a fine grater to grate a hardboiled egg (or two) over the toast and sauce. garnish with chives, olives, or whatever takes your fancy.